I am going to try to write this cheating admission as brief as possible. The reason for that is because I found out that I can literally write pages and pages about almost any aspect of my life. Writing down everything that I want to would require me to invest more time on grammar rules, paragraph structure, and so on.

I am going to admit to having cheated over the years. The intensity of which varies from petty .tbl cheats which include rapid fire, no screenshake, colorbotting, and a blue rail scanner. I also used some huds. When it came to huds the intent with most of those wasn't cheating, but just having something different. I do acknowledge the full screen scanners are cheating. Remember, I've been playing rf since I was a kid and taste can change a bit. As I got older, I became more of a minimalist. I prefer stock the most.

Cheating is always low, but I feel the most guilt about colorbotting. I was not a very good colorbotter. I did it differently than most rf players. It was actually more of a pain to colorbot than not. I wasn't the type that used a rail gun and hit every shot. I actually used an assault rifle. So yes, I cheated in a match against fuV'. Regardless of whether or not they cheated in the past, my intuition actually tells me they played entirely fair the 1st match which I believe was Warlords. I won't go in depth about how I know they played fair, but I am 100% sure. I can't remember the other matches. Most of the colorbotting was done around 2006 to 2007.

There is a psychology behind me and cheating. I could write on and on about it, but again it would take forever. I was weird when it came to cheating though. Did I cheat in every single game? I have cheated in almost every single rf match I have ever played if we include the fact that I use screenshake removal. Infact, screenshake removal is my favorite cheat to use. In match servers, on a day to day basis I play with the worst hardware. I tried to rationalize screenshake removal because bad frames per second seems to heavily penalize players when using the assault rifle. Another way I tried to rationalize it was the fact that sometimes I get dizzy from screenshake. After analyzing myself, the real reason I wanted to use it was for better aim. It hardly improves aim honestly.

Psychologically, psychiatrically, and biologically I am the most unusual specimen you will ever meet. As mentioned earlier there is a psychology behind me cheating and its not always (but frequently) driven by jealousy, anger, envy or any other negative stereotypical trait. For example, I have a psychological fear of giving up control. I had a bad experience growing up where I was forced into a position of being powerless. In part, that contributes to my gravitation toward cheating. To
some degree I have a fear of losing and noticed that I do not like losing to people who rail a lot. I could go on and on about the psychology of cheating not just online games, but real life too (academics). One thing I am super concerned about is that if player A sees player B cheating, overtime player B may be tired of losing to player A. So player B will either quit the game or start cheating themselves.

I actually would've played better in every single game except a few of the rail matches (so yes I cheated against shadymike in a rail map and MuD too). I wasn't too excited about ESL honestly. Part of the reason I played RF was just to burn time.

Incase anyone is wondering, I only wallhacked twice. One was just to test it. Second time, I left it in my multi folder on accident and it was in a 1v1. This was around 2005 if I recall correctly.

For the most part, lost to all the same people I would have lost to and won against the same people I would have won against. My accuracy is actually higher with screenshake on with simply a cheap qck mousepad and a usable mouse than it is with cheating. I actually didn't use a mousepad for a large portion of my rf career so I always tried to play sneaky and go for flags.

I would like for everyone to forgive me for my self righteousness and being an idiot.

Why am I admitting to cheating in 2016? I did some long in-depth self analysis upon my life. I think there are psychological benefits to posting this. For example, I may not want to cheat again. Why didn't I post earlier? Apathy is the biggest reason. I am happy about admitting this actually. It took me this long to do in-depth self analysis because I would be scared of what I have to look at.

I'm thankful for all the matches I was given.

I do not see anything in this post that wouldn't belong in this forum. I would like the topic to be open for a few days and than closed. If the admins believe it should be closed, I trust nick and digi's judgement.

In case anyone is wondering between April 27th 2016 and May 3rd 2016 I played some matches. I did not cheat in any of those. I was testing another mouse. I've only ever bought 2 gaming mice and I probably would've been better off with a plain Microsoft mouse and just adjusting the sensitivity in pf settings. I think having a simple qck mousepad is more important than what mouse. In case anyone is wondering, I worked hard to get reasonable at the game. Sadly though, did cheat.

I'm actually sorry for anyone I trolled too.

Edit:
The reason I do not play much is because I do not find the game fun anymore and do not feel comfortable getting any wins against people that I cheated against.

Here we go again

I believe that you being so mental about this dead game makes you a unusual specimen.
Don't think anyone would care if you cheated in the past or not. And what makes you think you'll get in reward after telling us all this shit? Get over it dude. This is pointless. BUT apologies are accepted.

ayyy



what happened to the good times maaaaaaan